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Heart clutching

It was one of those awful mornings, the knots twisting up in my stomach before I even arrived at the blood bank. It had been so incredibly long since I had last given even a morsel of blood by the mere pricking of even a finger. Arriving on scene I was relieved when I ran into my old pal. He was such a pro at giving blood he was the one who got me started at donating in the first place, he was pretty talented at persuading this time he even brought a friend with him. After a few beds were cleared I was brought to one on which I laid down wincing as the needle dug it's throbbing pin into my arm. Two beds which lay at the foot of mine simontaneously became vacant, my pal in one his friend in the other, all the while laying there his friend jabbered away with me he was horrified and remarking at how awful and painful it looked as I lay there just hoping for my bag to fill up so I could leave. Finally I was finished and was allowed to leave home... a few days later my pal told me that "he" was interested in going on a date... not one to date much I figured why not? He picked me up casually as we drove away down the dusty old roads in his red pick up truck. I never imagined anything to come from it... but time grew on and I found myself heart a flutter as I heard the chiming of the telephone. Never in my life have I experienced such an emotional bond between somebody, no sexual relations did we have but this great personality bonding. We took things so incredibly slow as we patiently learned everything about one another slowly explored the depth of each other emotionally and later physically. He was always by my side through everything, everything. Unfortunately things took a horrible turn, I lost my grandfather, and was submerged into a world where I lost myself everything I knew crumbled beneath my very feet, it was hard to even breath let alone clutch onto the tiniest thread of our love. I am still in love with him, as I know that he still loves me, but I fear we will never be able to be together again. I close my eyes and can smell his sweet cologne, can feel the way his arm felt wrapped around me as we bobbed up in down those gravel roads, his heart not only clutching the wheel but forever gripping at my heart.


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