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I was skeptical of everything

Even at the tender age of fourteen, I was skeptical of everything. Parents divorced, sexual assaults and court hearings, near poverty...I thought I'd seen everything and could see through anything.

As a tender fourteen year old with a practically nonexistent social life sometimes does, I found a temporary solace in the Internet. People from all sorts of backgrounds, genders and tolerance levels flocking to and fro - just where was I going to go? My high interest in literature lead me to a text-based Roleplaying website.

I was quick to gain a name and reputation there, and through accidental measures I found my soul mate. Being a skeptic even now of websites that claim to pair up potential "love matches," I certainly do believe that it was some sort of sick destiny that drew me to my man.

I lived in Michigan, and he in Minnesota. December 10, 2005 and I was still fourteen, and he was just out of the gate for being twenty. I was preparing for a role in my high school's production. Being that it was my first acting role as a high school student, I soul was bruised by the possibility of failure. Addressing the lightest of these worries to an open chat room, he started talking to me, consoling me and wishing me the very best.

I added him to my MSN messenger list and went about my merry way.

We talked every day, practically, about life and the trials that it provided. Here and there I wondered what it would be like to be romantically involved with this guy, but I knew that the distance and the age difference would damage my standing with my own family.

The summer of 2006 was when I knew I loved him. I don't know when it happened, or how it happened...but it did. I did not want to be unrealistic in hoping that we would be together forever, so I began relaying the more secretive depths of my life that I would dare not tell any of my other long-term online pals.

He accepted me, which was something that no one else had ever done for me before. I've been tolerated, acknowledged and yes, ignored by my peers before, so this interested me immediately.

August 9th, 2006 was the date we considered ourselves "officially" dating. My mom was wary when I informed her, but accepted it as a phase, and played the part of the supportive mother that some my age wished they had.

He didn't finish high school, and I did. He got his GED, while I received my diploma. He had tried college before, but failed, I aspired for great things outside of my high school curriculum. He, the workaholic dreamer, and I the pushy realist.

But now, in the present, he is in college again, and is thriving far more than he ever thought possible. I could never be more proud in a solitary human being than I am in my boyfriend.

I've been extremely lucky when it comes to my relationship. Three and a half years strong (since it is now January of 2010), and now we finally live together. I do not have to run from my fears, nor my torrid past, when I am enveloped in his arms or looking up into his face. I don't have to run any longer from the memories that left severe stains on my heart.

He is twenty four, I am eighteen, and neither of us have to run anymore.






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