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A Year of Crush

I'm a hopeless romantic who likes to daydream and believe in fairytales. I've always had crushes since I was seven. But they would all last about one to three months, and then I'd get over them. But in 2009, everything changed.

It happened two months before my twelfth birthday. 6th of July. It was a Monday. I developed a crush on a guy, let's call him K. It only started as a crush. But soon I was crazy about him and I couldn't forget him. We were great friends, and everything that he did was perfect to me. After two months and a half, I found out who his crush was. So I became depressed and tried liking one of my juniors. I failed though.

So I continued liking him all through the school holidays (November and December). I had gotten close to him ever since I crushed on him. I only saw him two times during the school holidays.

We both went to different secondary schools after that. However, we both still contacted each other online and once in a while we would hang out with all our friends. I would treasure all those times. In February I missed him so badly and I stalked his wall everyday, liked and commented everything. I soon stopped though because I didn't want to seem like a desperate person. I still stalked him though, without liking or commenting anything. I knew he liked someone else and would never like me. We rarely got to see each other anyway. But I continued liking him. I cried so much because of him.

Soon, April came. I tried to develop a crush on my classmate. I still stalked and talked to K, though. My crush for my classmate faded as May came when I found out who he liked. It was so easy to get over him. But not K. Everything about K was perfect to me.

So I was sad and miserable because I had been wanting him for 10 months, and he never once noticed me. I had been hoping so much from him.

But soon a senior named F told me he liked me. And because I was sad and clumsy that time, and desperately in need of love, I accepted him.

After a week and a few days, I regretted accepting him because I knew I couldn't ever have feelings for him the way I did for K. I should break up with him.

I have had feelings for K 10 months, 10 days and counting.
I wonder if I'll ever get over him.


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