What can I do to show my love and support for him?

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Visitor's Question:
Me and my boyfriend have been going out for about a couple months shy of a year, but have been friends for several years. My boyfriend was always a very active and independent person. Hes had a very ruff year, in the beginning of the summer, there was a terrible tragedy, and his best friend unexpectedly passed away. This of course was very hard on him, and I tried to be there for him as best I could. A couple of weeks after that happened, he moved from an apartment with roommates, into his own place. At first he was very happy about it, but after living by himself for a couple of months hes starting to feel very lonely, and has been recently talking about his old friend a lot. I go to school, and work full time, so I can only visit him on the weekends. Im afraid that hes becoming depressed. When I see him, he always seems super happy, and we always have a lot of fun, but during the week when I call him he usually seems troubled. He doesn’t do anything during the week. I try to give him suggestions of places to go, or things to do around the house, but he never does any of them. All he ever does is text me and say "im depressed today" when I call him, he just say "im feeling lonely right now, and I just want to be by myself" and hangs up I know hes still grieving from his friends passing, and getting used to a new place in a new town. What can I do to show my love and support for him short of visiting him during the week?




Our Suggestion:
I suppose it is out of the question for him to move closer to you or to move in with you. That's the first thing that comes to mind.

You may be able to nourish him with food. When you are visiting him, drop by a take out place and place an order for Wednesday (for example) and pay for it.
That way he has food for Wed and Thur. It's harder to be depressed on a full stomach.

See if you can get his old room-mates to call him and ask him over or out to do something. Explain to them that he's having a hard time adjusting to his old friends death.

Hope some of this helps! George



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