I need her back

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Visitor's Question:
Me and my girlfriend were dating for 8 months. Things were awesome for a long time, we got along so well, and we both told each other that we had never felt this way or been more comfortable to be around anyone else before. Well, I did some stupid things to push her feelings away. To be short, I didnt tell her the whole truth about some things, and sometimes I could be arrogant or annoying to others when she was around me, which I know she didnt like. Also, when she tried to give me advice on things, I pretty much took it as her nagging me, which looking back now, was so stupid. It was nothing I did on purpose or intended to hurt her. I just made some mistakes that I know are not in my nature, and I want to show her the real me again, and that I have grown-up and changed for the best.

She broke up with me about 4-5 weeks ago, and at first I was pretty much begging her to take me back. I sent her flowers, letters, etc. Now I know that I shouldnt have done this, but it doesnt matter now, its in the past. I have been told to completely cut off contact with her for 1 solid month (just started at the beginning of NOV), and then go from there. Any advice on what I can do to show her Ive changed, and to show her she can feel the same way she did when we started dating would be much appreciated. I am really bummed out because she was the first girl I have ever loved, and I didnt tell her this until after she broke up with me, which I am very ashamed of. So any help would be greatly appreciated, thanks...




Our Suggestion:
If I understand correctly, you are going to cut off contact with her for the month of November and you want advice on getting her back after that.

You have made your point with her that you love her. She didn't respond to that. I don't think cutting her off for a month is the right direction to go. It will be more miserable for you than for her. Instead ask her if you can call her once a week for 15 mins just to see how she is doing. If she says yes, don't discuss your relationship during the 15 mins except a quick "I miss you" but nothing more. Maybe after talking for a month or so like this she may begin to recognize that you have changed. She will know if you've changed, you can't prove it to her... you really have to change.

Good luck! George

--Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com




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