Military Guy and Girl

Suggest Advice

Do you have some advice for this person?

Visitor's Question:
WELL MY BOYFRIEND AND I HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR ABOUT 2 YEARS AND WE'RE BOTH IN THE MILITARY. WELL A 1 1/2 YEARS AS GONE BY AND THERE WERE THIS NEW FEMALE INTO THE MILTIARY AND I FIGURED THAT I'LL HELP HER OUT SO IT WON'T BE TO HARD ON HER LIKE IT WAS WHEN I JUST GOT IN.

BUT THEN AS TIME WENT ON I'VE NOTICED LITTLE THINGS THAT SHE WOULD DO AND THE WAY THAT SHE ACTED WHEN MY BOYFRIEND WAS AROUND. WELL I'VE TOLD MY BOYFRIEND THE THINGS THAT I'VE NOTICED AND HE SAID THAT IT'S INNOCENT THAT THEIR NOT DOING ANYTHING THAT HE LOVES ME AND HE COULD NEVER DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT TO ME. WELL TO BE HONEST WITH YOU I TRUST MY BOYFRIEND BUT I DON'T TRUST HER ANYMORE AROUND HIM.

I DON'T LIKE THEM TOGETHER FOR ANYTHING BUT WHEN I TALK TO HIM ABOUT HOW I FEEL, HE MAKES ME FEEL BAD THAT I HAVE THESE FEELINGS. I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S IN MY MIND BUT I CAN'T HELP THE WAY THAT I FEEL. PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT I SHOULD DO OR IS IT ALL IN MY MIND?

Our Suggestion:
There are definitely girls out there who are stalkers. They find a guy they like and want to 'grab him' no matter if he's dating someone else or not. If you are going to worry about every girl like that, you're going to be in agony for the rest of your life. The best you can do is work with your guy, trust him, and hope that those girls go on and find a new target in life.

Yes, she is probably out to get any guy that seems good, regardless of what his status is. And yes, she's betraying you because here you were trying to help her out, and she's repaying your kindness by trying to steal your guy away. But you are NOT her, and your guy is in love with you. You both know this girl isn't exactly the best of girls. So you deal with her and go on with your lives.

I wouldn't encourage her, I would try to minimize contact with her and get her involved with other groups and friends. Hopefully her focus will switch to someone else when it's convenient. I would make sure that you and your guy remain focussed on each other and remind each other daily how wonderful it is that you have each other. She'll be jealous of that, yes, but maybe she can find that for herself elsewhere. You shouldn't let her insecurity affect the love you two have for each other.

I have pages on love touches here -

http://www.romanceclass.com/miscr/LoveCat/7621

give some a try and keep you two focussed one each other!

--Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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