I Love my Friend - She's Moving Away

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Visitor's Question:
I have a rather unique situation. I think that I am in love with my friend of 4 years. We flirt and what not, even gave each other a whole bunch of pet names/nicknames.

Last year she started to date a good friend of mine, who ironically used to tease me for liking her before they were even together. They recently split up about 3 or 4 months ago, and I think she is still hung up on the break up.

I went off to a out-of-state school 5 months ago, and we been keeping in touch through phone calls nonstop. I find myself having very strong feelings for her. But in a few months she herself is going to go out-of-state for school.

I don't know if its too soon to tell her how I feel due to her break up, however if I don't tell her soon she will be even further away from me at her school. If she doesn't feel the same way I do, I don't want to lose what we already have. But if she DOES feel the same way I don't want to make things feel wierd for my friend she used to date. And if anything should happen I don't know how long distance relationship will work. There are alot of complications in the matter, what should I do???



Our Suggestion:
Actually the situation you're in is one of the most common situations. Most people fall in love with a friend in their circle of friends because those are the people they get to know and become comfortable with. In fact I have a FAQ for that on the site homepage -

http://www.romanceclass.com/miscr/howto/friendlover.asp

Yes, you have long distance getting involved too, and that's also normal, with the way people move around these days :)

There's really no rush here. You guys are already long distance. So if you get longer long distance that doesn't make things much better or worse. Keep up your contact, and slowly increase its closeness. I have lots of long distance tips on the site. Don't just leap into "I love you!". Instead, SHOW her how you feel by slowly increasing the level of personal touches. Find ways to get together with her even if it's only occasionally. Lots of people drive cross country for weekend trips, so consider a few trips to keep that face to face time in there.

--Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com



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