She's Cheating Over Email

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Visitor's Question:
I've been seeing my girlfriend for nearly 10 months. We met through friends at college and hit it off straight away. She says that she loves me and never wants to be apart from me ever and is quite protective of me as she doesn't like me having other friends that are girls. She is so stunning with shiney dark hair, a lovely figure and I always trusted her.

Over the last few months someone annonomously e-mailed me with an e-mail conversation she had with this fella. I cant reply to this person cos it wont let me reply so I went into her e-mails which I'm ashamed to do but glad I did. There were e-mails to this guy who I dont know and some were flirty and some were too flirty for my liking.

I can't really confront her as I have invaded her privacy but I cant get this out of my head. Am I worrying about nothing.

Our Suggestion:
The primary connection in any relationship is being honest with each other. So if you know she is cheating on you, you HAVE to be able to talk about it. If you can't even talk about it when it's email flirtation, how could you possibly address all the much more serious issues that come up in life?

Yes, you found out by reading her email. But in a real relationship, people share email messages and go through each other's purses/wallets looking for change and everything else. It shouldn't be a CRIME to do these things because there's nothing that should be hidden! The fact that she is actively flirting with other guys while she tells you not to have female friends is completely hypocritical.

I strongly recommend you sit down and talk with her about this. Either you get this straightened out now or she's going to keep flirting and keeping her 'guys on the side' and think it's perfectly fine for HER to keep safety nets around while treating you like an 8 year old.

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