I loved her with all of my heart.

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Do you have some advice for this person?

Visitor's Question:
Me and my ex girlfriend were together for about 2 and a half years. We would argue over stupid things all the time and end up not talking to each other for the rest of the night or sometimes even for a day or two. A year into our relationship she ended up breaking up with me because of our fights, but it only lasted a week, and she asked to have me back. So I took her back, and everything went okay for a while. I loved her with all of my heart. We had some very beautiful moments togther. We also lost our virginity to each other about a year and a half into the relationship. I always thought I'd be with her forever. I've dated many women in my teens and they all never compared like my Ex did. Then one night coming home from work (I had a really bad day) we had another stupid argument and i was just fed up with everything and told her we should break up. I made a really foolish mistake. Later that week, about 3 days later, I explained myself and told her that I didnt mean the things I had said and that I was very sorry and wanted her back. She told me that it was better that we stayed apart, and immediatly I became heartbroken. I was so stupid for letting her go. Right now i've been without her for a month and im going crazy. I miss her terribly and cry myself to sleep every night. I just want her back in my life.. how do I win her heart again?

Our Suggestion:
Tell her all of this. And figure out what causes those fights because there's no way you're going to get her back if she thinks that you'll fall back into your old behaviors. You need to make her believe that you're done with the arguing and that you're focussed on making your relationship with her one that will last and will bring you both more happiness. She doesn't want to be hurt again, understandably. Give her reason to believe she won't be hurt.

One thing you could say is that you took her back when she broke up with you, so it's only fair for her to give you one more chance. Then make the most of it.

Good luck!

--Jenn

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