What can I do so that I remain the one she dreams about at night.

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Visitor's Question:
My wife is as of right now 4 months pregnant. She is, to say the least, irritable. She says things to me out of anger that really sometimes hurt my feelings (and thats a hard thing to do) and she seems sometimes like she has no remorse. It seems that we hardly kiss, hug or even have sex anymore. And it seems here lately she has been talking about experiences with her past abusive ex-fiance. She even told me that she had a dream about getting back together with him. What can I do so that I remain the one she dreams about at night. I feel so bad right now you dont even understand.



Our Suggestion:
Pregnancy does strange things to women. But it doesn't excuse her bad behavior toward you. She might be acting like she has no remorse because she's embarassed with how she's acting. But this is something you need to talk with her about. You should tell her next time when she's cutting you down that you won't take her talking to you like that. Make it clear that she can't treat you like that, no matter her condition. In the same conversation, find out what is going on inside her and how she's feeling, what she wants and how she wants it. She might be feeling really uncomfortable with her changing body. She may think that you're no longer liking how she looks or that you're not looking at her as a sexual being anymore. She might be looking at having a kid and considering herself as a mother, rather than a lover. Pregnancy does trip out women like this. I know when I was pregnant, it really changed how I looked at myself. But no matter what, your relationship should stay strong throughout and the only real way of doing that is to keep communication lines open. And trust that this is only a 9 month blip in your relationship, and then things will get back to normal. More or less, minus 3am feeding times.

I wish you the best.

Jenn


--Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com



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