I am bemused by this, so I can understand how confusing it must be for you.
You said that you had separated one and a half years ago ~ no sexual relations ~ yet she thought that she was pregnant 4 months or so ago??? So you have not been completely 'separate' during this time?
Is it possible that she would like another baby ~ and that this is why you see her looking thoughtful, etc. If she did have a miscarriage, then it is possible that she is now yearning for another baby. This has happened to women I know.
I think that she needs to speak honestly about her feelings and what she wants and does not want out of life ~ and about youi daughter and her needs.
Marriages have to be worked at. If you love someone ~ as you two seem to love each other ~ then you do not throw that away, without even trying, very hard, to save it ~ especially when there is a child involved.
Why would she hide her feelings?
I don't understand this.
You have known her for several years, so I'm guessing that you must have some ideas about why she does what she does.
Do you think that she was too young to settle down in a long-term relationship at 18, and that, though she loves you, she also wants the freedom to make different choices, perhaps?
It is not at all unusual for people who fall in love in their teens to fall out of love again in their twenties. They change and they grow apart from the partners who once seemed perfect for them. It happens a lot.
If you can get her to sit down and talk seriously about all of this, then that might help. It's what you need.
Good luck!
