She told me she already knew.

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
Iím 20, in university, and have known this girl for a little more than a year, and she is practically my best friend.

We are both very shy, neither of us are very social and I in particular, like to keep to myself. We are both part of the same society, so we see each other quite a lot and we always sit together, despite being hideously shy, I find that I can talk to her properly. I think we are reasonably close, for me at least, I am closer to her than I have been with anyone else for a long time.

Her dorm just happens to be on my route home, so I always walk her back. Iím very quiet so it gives me a chance to talk to her. I've made sure she knows I enjoy spending my time with her, and that she makes me feel comfortable. A few months before the summer break, I realised how I felt about her, I'd never really thought about it before, and over the holidays Iíd agonised over it, I convinced myself that when I saw her again, I would tell her how I felt.

I ended up putting it off, but we ended up hanging out more, she convinced me to join another society with her.

I'd noticed that some of my acquaintances must like her as well, when one of these guys asked her to see the fireworks in November, she asked me if I wanted to go in response. I didnít like it, I tried to decline, but she convinced me anyway and we ended up going in a group. I think she is completely oblivious to this kind of stuff.

After a really good night, I told her how I felt, I told her I liked her more than anything, and that I just wanted her to know. She told me she already knew, its likely that one of my more sociable acquaintances, who like her, told her I did (Because he asked me).

Afterwards, we carried on completely as normal. The problem is, I dont know how she feels at all, and with her being hit on all the time, I have no idea what to do. Sometimes I think she is just being courtious, trying not to hurt my feelings. Advice
You did everything right by being honest, and she knows just how you feel. The fact that she did not pursue that any further speaks volumes. She seems to value you as a friend. If that is enough for you, then be happy with that. Things may grow or evolve later. Just don't push her in any romantic way. Try asking her to do things with you from time to time - easy, friendly things like catching a movie or grabbing a latte, and see what happens. Good luck!

-- from Jill
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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