From BFFs to bf and gf

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
My best guy friend and I have known each other for almost a year. We're 18 days apart, so age isn't an issue. We talk about everything, and lately he's been a bit obsessive over who i like. I'm 99% sure I love him and from the way he acts would bet all of my money he loves me back. The only problem is that he continues to *say* we're *just friends*. Because I don't want to risk our friendship, I agree, but I have to wonder what would happen if we admitted how we feel. I'm also holding back bacause I'm afraid pressure from our peers who have seen us growing closer and closer might be influencing us and after a few months we'll fall apart. Other than that I want to take our relationship to the next level. Summer is coming and I'm afraid that I'll miss him too much. I already miss him on weekends. I need to know if I should take the first step and ask him out, and if so, how? I hope this info helps. Thank you so, so much in advance for your advice. You don't know how much it means to me. Advice
This is a very common dilemma. It's like we should wear special tee shirts that say, "I like you as more than friends", since it is so scary to actually talk about it one on one.

The thing is, if you do have a strong friendship, you can get over this kind of bump if he doesn't like you that way. If you lose the friendship over it, then maybe the closeness was really only based on secret longings anyway.

I'd try to clear the air. Try to talk about it, letting him know that your friendship is the most important thing. Good luck!

-- from Jill
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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