Dating an older guy
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old FemaleI met this guy at co-ed volleyball. We hit it off right from the get-go. I asked my ex's aunt (I suppose that'd be a whole other topic, eh? :) ) how old he is, and her gues was as good as mine: somewhere in his mid-20's. I am 18 years old, and am accustomed to dating older guys because the "crowd I run with" is mostly 20-somethings. And so I saw no harm in flirting with this guy, and getting to know him better. The more I got to know him, the more I realized how much we have in common; everything from books to music to movies... everything, really. Come to find out, though, he is 39 years old. I realize that this relationship, or potential relationship, is completely politically incorrect, what I am wondering is if it is also morally wrong to date a guy that is as old as one's father. As I had said, I am 18, but got all of the partying and whatnot out of my system years ago. I am going to college in the fall, and am already close to being a liscenced medical transcriptionist. I am ready to marry and start a family, and I know that he is as well. To be honest, I'm expecting an answer that says something like "find someone your own age," so let me just say that I have very little in common with guys my own age, and generally don't want the same things. And so, I guess the point of this question is:
Is it wrong for me to date a man 20 years older than I?
RomanceClass.com AdviceThere is nothing wrong with dating someone much older. The drawbacks are that you will not share a common culture (friends for example). You say you are very compatible, which can sometimes be a problem with age differences.
So, there is nothing wrong giving it a go. Just be prepared to separate if the relationship starts to crack. For example you should wait until after college to marry and have kids. By that time he will be 43 and you 22.
Good luck,
George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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