I am successfully drawing him closer to me but the only problem is his new gfWe often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions. Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female Hi, I am so sad, I am finding my ways to get my ex-guy back and it has been for 5 months, things are getting better now but still not to avail, coz he is dating new girl now and I am crafting my ways to be his good friend, it looks better for now ( say it, 70% out of 100%) coz I successfully drawing him closer to me but the only problem is his new gf coz he is on the rebound with her and just started the relationship last month.. The problem now, I am so tired to pretend to be his good friend but this guy is strange, if I tell him that I want him back, he will go away again from me so I must use TACTICS to get him back but now, I am really tired, I wish to end it sooner, how I wish to get him back as my bf and start a new and forget all the bad memories….but If I tell him that I love him, then I will lose all my hard work for 5 months..Help me….what to do to end this game sooner? I lost my energy…. User Submitted Advice from a 31-40 year old Female Be honest with him I agree with George. My ex started seeing someone almost immediately after we broke up but I know it's a rebound. He was distraught over ME starting a new relationship (or so he thought) and 'coincidentally' just happened to meet someone the same night he found that out. I have to keep my feelings and emotions 'in check' and see it for what it is. You seem to be doing the same. If you get your emotions out of control you will ruin your relationship with him either it be a friendship or more. I keep in contact via email with my ex. I know I have been 'drawing him closer' as well. He doesnt initiate contact with me (due to his seeing someone) but whenever I email him he is happy to hear from me and also flirts. He's gone as far to even say he's been thinking of me lately... Now, I know my ex still has very strong feelings for me but is not in a place in his life where he is ready to get back into emotional involvement. He is amidst stressful exams for his profession right now and it is overwhelming to him. This relationship he is in however is not emotionally involved. (He hasnt said that to me, but if he's flirting with me and wanting to stay in contact with me what do YOU think?) He keeps stressing the importance for us to work on friendship.... Is there guarantee he will come back to me? Of course not. But I have (as George suggested) given MYSELF time. My life is not on hold but rather I have decided to keep the contact once a week or so and give him until the New Year. (November are his exams are over). I even wrote him a letter telling him how I feel, and that i choose to give him time and I will 'be there'. I also said that I will move on when my heart tells me to. So I have made it clear that i will not wait forever. As I 'give time', I get stronger everyday. That does not mean that I love him any less but that I realize happiness is my own responsibility. I want him back, yes. But it is not within my control. My choices, my reactions, my emotions and my happiness are however. Be honest with him. Give him time if it's what you believe in. But make YOURSELF the first priority. The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer
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