Does he love me or not?We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions. Original Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female I have been dating this guy for 3 years now. We went to the same college, and graduated from the same high school, which is where we met. He was a senior and I was a Junior. Everything was always great, I got along great with his family, his brother even called me sister. I had a 3 month internship over our second summer together and we kept the relationship long distance and he came to visit me for a week. Everthing was great in the bedroom as well, we were eachothers "firsts", and we always did everything together, I thought we would for sure get married! We even talked about moving out of state. Well during my last year of college, I was up at school and he was at home, working. In my last semester, towards the end I went home fro spring break and he broke up with me, with the reason, I am too young. He had just turned 21.He said he still loved me but wanted to go out and have fun and not worry about me, but he said that this probably wouldn't last long, he just wanted to see how it would be. He wanted everything with us to remain the same. Well come to find out the week after he broke up with me he started having sex with another girl, who calls him. I asked him if this is what they were doing and he said yes. He said having sex with her means nothing to him.Also I told him that he couldn't possibly still love me if he could do this to me. He eventually told his family, like his cousins too that him and i would definatly be geting back together, and he still gives me presents on hoidays. he still calls me all day and we continue to talk. He even comes to visit me on my last couple weeks of school. My question is...is it worth it to wait for him? I am still very much in love, but i can't belive he only waited a week and it doesn't bother him to hurt me this way. Should I expect him to comeback to me? or just try to move on?? User Submitted Advice from a 13-20 year old Female Do your own thing well, i think that if he really wants you, then he'll come back to you. I know that it seems weird right now, but a lot of people feel like this when they have been in a committed relationship for a long time. They feel the need to explore their options before settling down. They want to know that they really do want to be with you. It's complicated, but it's normal. If I were you I would hope that it worked out in the future, but for the mean time I would not talk to him as much and not let him do anything with me other than talk, becasue if you do, then he's getting the best of both worlds and won't feel the need to commit to you for a while. Also, focus on the things that maybe you never had time for, or that you wanted to do. Now is your chance to go out and be free- take advantage of it. Just becasue you're going out and doing things doesn't mean that you don't love him or that you care about him less. It just signals to him that you're not going to wait around forever for him, even if you want to. This will make him realize what he's missing or loosing and most likely he will be begging you to take him back and asking for your forgiveness. But you HAVE to cut off most off your connection with him- as in dont' talk to him as much, dont call him abck right away unless it's an emergency. Let at least an hour go by before you call him back and say "hey, i just got back in and realized ya called. what's up?.. This will make him feel like he isn't the center of your attention and he'll miss it. Prompting him to want you back. But don't just take him back if he begs you to. Make him work for your affection so to say. He hurt you adn you need to make him realize that you deserve to be respected and appreciated and that you won't tolerate that type of promiscuis behavior if you decide to go back out with him. But do forgive him right off the bat becasue he's human and we all make mistakes. Don't hold it against him, let the act go, but reinforce why he needs to not do thta again. I hope that makes sense and helps you out. I know exactly what you are talking about. It will be okay. And eve nif you don't get back together, which i think you will get back together, you won't feel so bad becasue you will be out there doing your own thing. Good Luck!! The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer
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