is it ok for my boyfriend to hang out with his ex?We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions. Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 7 months and we recently moved in togeather. He used to live with his ex girlfriend years ago but she moved to another state to teach. well she has came home atleast 5 times since me and him have been togeather and everytime she comes in he has to be with her the whole time and i am not allowed to hangout with them because she gets mad. he says they are just friends but it just does not feel right when i am allowed to hang out with his other friends that are guys but not her. he doesnt get it and says he is doin nothing wrong. she came in last month and i had enough so i kicked him out. we stayed broke up for a couple weeks and then i finally forgave him then she came in again this weekend and the same shit happened. so i broke up with him for good. i have not answered his phone calls or texts but he really hasnt called that much. i dont know if that means he really doesnt care or what. i am so hurt that it has actually made me sick. Am i over reacting or did i do the right thing. Help a girl out. User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female Drop ex I disagree, I am a female who has recently broken up with my bf. Our situation is a little different because we had been together for 5 years and started a business together. We were always better friends than lovers except for the honeymoon period of the first 9 months. The fact that we are remaining friends, working together daily & at the moment even flat mates makes its difficult but the relationship had ended for many reasons. I certainly don't want to see him & his gf sitting on the couch all lovey dover in front of me now or in 5 years time. I certainly don't want my ex-bf around when I'm with another guy. A mutual respect is required and insecurities from the other person should not be dumped on the boyfriend or girlfriend who has managed to do what we would all ideally like, 'to be friends with our exs'. It is not his problem that he/she is so insecure within themselves that the other partner must 'change'. Compromise is one thing but even if the partner does stop seeing his/her ex the insecurity problem is still there and has just been covered over by a temporary fix. Showing you're o.k with the relationship of the ex would be such a drawing card for your partner to stay with you. Not many people would have that quality. The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer
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