Dating with a DisabilityWe often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions. Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Male I am a 23-and-a-half year old male. I have a minor spinal chord defect that effects me mildly from the waist down. Statistically it could effect my "performance" - you know what I mean! I have not had that much relationship experience, in fact the furthest I've ever "gone with a girl" is kissing. My last "real" kiss was over two and a half years ago, the night before she disappeared (see below). I have had a few dates since then, but they never worked out. Most people don't even notice my condition unless I tell them. The main problem I have with relationships is that every time I find someone that could be "someone special" I have no idea how/when to tell her of my disability????? When I do tell her (or if she discovers in other ways) she inevitably runs for the hills and I never see them again. In one instance she even distanced herself from our mutual friend that introduced us in the first place. How do I tell her while keeping the "run for it" risk down? One other problem is that I keep falling head over heels with a girl only to find out much later that she already has a guy. In one case of this I was meeting a girl for dinner once a week for about six weeks before she (quite cryptically) told me about her boyfriend. It always turns out that she only ever liked me as a FRIEND! (I'm really starting to HATE that word!) It's happened at least three times in the last two years! User Submitted Advice from a 31-40 year old Male Rose tinted Jenn you need to wake up your response is a pile of rose tinted horse crap The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer
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