He Wants to be Friends - I Can't Do ThatWe often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions. Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female Hello, To make a long story short. I broke up with a guy who I was dating for a year. He insists we should remain friends. I've told him many times that I can't be his friend because I'm in love with him. (the reasons for the breakup and even our relationship are complicated and it will take a longer email to explain). I really need to get over him but he's not making easy for me. To the best of my knowledge I know he does not love me the way I love him. I know if I keep contact with him I'm not going to heal anytime soon. I have explain everything to him with no reserve and he still wants to be my friend. Our realtionship has no future. What can I do? I need some help...I need to move on. I need to get him out of my head and heart. User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female Take care of yourself I believe it is very hard to get over someone you love while trying to maintain a friendship with the person. My advice is: get away UNLESS you do share a friendship with him that's very special and which makes it worth the while to prolong your healing process (for it will be longer with him around as a friend). What you need to know is that you will eventually heal, the question is whether the friendship you have with him is worth the effort and the pain of trying to heal while keeping him as a friend. While answering this question, be careful to discern friendship from the love feelings you now hold for him. Once you answer the question, you'll know what to do... And remember, you need to take care of yourself and be her friend before being anyone else's. NT The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer
|