She knows that I deserve better than her, she even says it, and says that I am literally a one in a million kind of guy, but she can't force herself to love me back. As much as that hurts to know, and as much as it hurts to know what she's done now that she's told me everything, I still care about her well being, despite the fact that she has done some stuff she promised she would never do. I told her that I cared about her and she just laughed it off saying "Well you shouldn't because nobody else does, not even me..." I know this has to do with her ex boyfriend and how she felt about him and how that affected her, which she didn't have sex with him btw, she made out with him, and the guy she gave a hickey to was the guy she had sex with, also. She feels scared I think because she doesn't believe that there is such thing as a forever kind of relationship anymore. My parents just divorced, her mom has been married a couple times and all of our friends parents have had problems, she has a fantasy idea that in a good relationship there isn't any problems I guess. She sees all these relationships going down, and she is afraid that that will happen to us so she doesn't want to get involved with anybody for fear of getting hurt, she just wants to be promiscuous and not have to worry about anything.
