Ok Raven, I know Im not in your situation and I don't know exactly whats going on...
But I was in an abusive marriage for 2 years. I got married very young because I had a baby and I didn't want my daughter not to have ehr daddy. It was the wrong reason. My husband became depressed and then an alcoholic and struck/abused me 5 times before I filed for divorce. The first time, it was a slap and a kick. I was 4 mo. preganant. The last time, he threw 7 full beer bottles at me from across the room, punched me in the chest three times and almost killed my daughter (one of the bottles almost hit her...like it missed by a 1/4 inch). He also hit my mom and friend when they tried to defend me and went to jail for 3 months.
I stayed so long becuas eI loved him, because I understood him and made excuses for his behavior, and becuas eI felt like I had no choice. I am lucky to be alive. I didn't realize that this was abuse and that he was controlling me until he wasn't there anymore.
Being abused inst a sign on weakness. It isn't your fault and it isnt something you should be ashamed of.
If it was okay for him to hit you, you wouldnt have any problem telling your therapist.
And if he thinks its okay for him to hit you, he will do it again and it will get worse...
Just my take on things.
