Yes, it's probably a shock to them ~ especially if they get on so well with your husband.
You appear, though, to be giving great consideration to the feelings of others, and you are trying to do what is best.
Their perceptions of the situation may not be correct ~ because they are not living it.
It's a shame that they cannot be supportive of both of you, at this difficult time.
Give them time to come to terms with their new knowledge and maybe things will improve. I hope so
Good luck
